So I originally developed a blog to give training and race reports. Over time, I have used it to express my thoughts and feelings on various topics. I enjoy it and I like that it gives me a voice. Today I am going to use that voice.
If you didn't know I am a pretty self confident person. I don't ever feel like I have to explain my actions or thoughts to anyone. Although I may seem in the clouds lots of times, I really am not and on important decisions I spend a lot of time thinking them through. As a adult, I have been through many situations that have made me the person I am. I will never feel like I owe an explanation for anything I do BUT one thing I do not like is people who know nothing about a situation making judgement on what they think is going on
So for the past few months, I have been the topic of conservation by many. Mostly behind my back and to each other. Let's start with the first round of gossip that gave so many people to talk about.
Stewart and I. No, we haven't had this on going relationship full of sex and escapades for as long as all of you would like to believe. I know it is much more fun to think I was cheating on Chuk but that is not the case. What we did have was a great friendship that spans back about 4 years, yep we have gone to happy hours, sporting events, parties, et. We have taken the kids to the zoo, movies, skating, you name it. We did talk to each other a lot and on the phone but all as friends and that is what makes what we have now oh so great!!! Yes, chuk and I broke up in August and he lived with me for a while. Because I am not 10, you may have seen us interact and talk to each other and yes I did start dating Stewart while he was still living in my house. Cheating, no. Sorry to disappoint you
So last week, I had a person, definitely not a friend even though she referred to me as one make cryptic Facebook posts about me and getting other friends all fired up.
She referred to me dumping my puppies at a shelter because they didn't fit my new lifestyle. You are right, Amanda they did not. After chuk left, I realized no one was home with the dogs ever!! On a good day we leave the house before 7 and am home by 6. When home, we say hi to the puppies and then all run upstairs where they are not allowed. It broke my heart to see how alone they were feeling. It was evident by the things they began to chew. Secondly, I love how she said Stewart wouldn't allow it. She doesn't even know him. Grow up!!! Yep, he is not a dog person but he is a Leslie person and would never make me do something I didn't want to do. We spent a lot if time talking about the situation About caring for these dogs that we now have 4 kids to take to various events, we no longer live 5 mins. Where we can run home between school and various activities. We talked a lot and felt like we made the right decision. The dogs were neglected and this was evident how they soaked up attention when we were there. I cried, Stewart cried, Morgan cried. Thanks to all of you making judgements and sending me nasty texts to make the situation easier.
As for dumping the dogs, I didn't dump them anywhere. I took them to a great lady who was recommended by Angie. If she recommends it, I trust it. Since then I have seen pictures and they are happy
Sorry to all of those who choose to believe that I am a horrible person. All my decisions were made in the best interest. I also have human children and human needs that have to be taken care of first
I hope someone else has a life event soon so you can talk about them and get your fix. Just remember things are not as always as they seem
And yep if you think I sound bitter then I am but in the meantime I will just continue to bask in my new found happiness. It has been a long time coming
Sunday, March 2, 2014
Monday, January 20, 2014
Finally... A race report... Baton Rouge Marathon
I finally have a race report for my new blog. I love that the first report will be favorable as well. We headed to Baton Rouge for the holiday weekend for me to do the full and Stewart to do the half. I was very excited to have Stewart share this weekend with me. This whole racing scene and that part of my life is still kind of a mystery to him. Nothing I wanted more than for him to be there and began to see what this is all about. I also will not lie, we are in that honeymoon stage where we can't get enough of each other so another road trip was great. I was very excited that he was going to do his very first half
We all know, I am not a big fan of the marathon and I have only done 3 open marathons in my running. Not counting 50k's or ironmen. During The race yesterday, I figured why I was not such a fan. Anyway, I disgress. I originally trained for a trail marathon back in Oct that didn't happen. I felt very fit so I thought, why not?? Do a road marathon and try to qualify for Boston. Training was going great and then travel and the holidays hit and I started missing or changing a lot of runs. 4 weeks ago, I had a great 22 miler and felt confident. I still had my peak week coming before I started taper. My peak week happened while in Corado and I ran 3 times and nothing over 8 miles. I figured I could catch up the next week. Came back to do my long run combined with the herbs half marathon. It was cold and rainy, I did the half and ran straight to the car- no extra miles. As I went Into this race, I knew I hadn't ran long in 4 weeks. I had a 13.1 and then everything was about 8 miles. I did know I had 3 things going for me. I had years of endurance and a ton built up this summer, all my short stuff was done fast so I knew I had really good general fitness, and I knew I had determination and a strong mental game. I would need all 3 to get this BQ. I also knew that even though 3:45 was my qualifying time, with this crazy new registration - I needed a buffer.
The day was beautiful and the course was beautiful. I pretty much cruised through the first 16 miles, feeling great and chatting to others. Things started to get a little harder but I knew I just needed to stay focused, make it to 20 and then start the countdown. I was extremely happy to see 20. The next 2 weren't too bad. The last 4 were hell. I reminded myself how lucky I was that I was out here running and doing something I loved. I reminded myself often how grateful I was that I had this ability. I also repeatedly told myself how strong I was. My pace began to drop as the effort increased but I was happy to see that I was still running a 3:45 pace so I was safe. The math was going through my head There was nothing more that I wanted then was to stop. Nothing more I wanted to see the finish line. I began to count how many laps this would be on the track. I wasn't talking, I wasn't smiling, I was focused. I told myself do this and u can run whatever at Boston, relax and have a good time. I realized then why I didn't like the marathon- it is hard - the focus it takes- the will to push when u feel like shit cuz if u slow down u could blow all the work u did the first 22 miles. I was never so happy to see mile 25. I knew I could do anything for a mile and I would soon start feeling the finish line adrenaline. I thought of my past 2 marathons, my first which was a pure mess, my second which I did get a BQ of 3:47 - needed 3:50 at the time which I hated and this one which I maybe kind of enjoyed. I saw the finish line and was thrilled to be able to stop running. Thrilled to have a 3:39 which gave me over a 5 minute buffet so I knew I could get in Boston and I got to see Stewart and see how his experience went
He did well and really enjoyed it. Something that made me extremely happy. He was already talking about the next one 😊 and actually training. If my training slacked, his really did. He ran twice in the last month. We spent the day laying in the grass enjoying the beautiful weather and then much eating and drinking followed. A perfect day and weekend.
We all know, I am not a big fan of the marathon and I have only done 3 open marathons in my running. Not counting 50k's or ironmen. During The race yesterday, I figured why I was not such a fan. Anyway, I disgress. I originally trained for a trail marathon back in Oct that didn't happen. I felt very fit so I thought, why not?? Do a road marathon and try to qualify for Boston. Training was going great and then travel and the holidays hit and I started missing or changing a lot of runs. 4 weeks ago, I had a great 22 miler and felt confident. I still had my peak week coming before I started taper. My peak week happened while in Corado and I ran 3 times and nothing over 8 miles. I figured I could catch up the next week. Came back to do my long run combined with the herbs half marathon. It was cold and rainy, I did the half and ran straight to the car- no extra miles. As I went Into this race, I knew I hadn't ran long in 4 weeks. I had a 13.1 and then everything was about 8 miles. I did know I had 3 things going for me. I had years of endurance and a ton built up this summer, all my short stuff was done fast so I knew I had really good general fitness, and I knew I had determination and a strong mental game. I would need all 3 to get this BQ. I also knew that even though 3:45 was my qualifying time, with this crazy new registration - I needed a buffer.
The day was beautiful and the course was beautiful. I pretty much cruised through the first 16 miles, feeling great and chatting to others. Things started to get a little harder but I knew I just needed to stay focused, make it to 20 and then start the countdown. I was extremely happy to see 20. The next 2 weren't too bad. The last 4 were hell. I reminded myself how lucky I was that I was out here running and doing something I loved. I reminded myself often how grateful I was that I had this ability. I also repeatedly told myself how strong I was. My pace began to drop as the effort increased but I was happy to see that I was still running a 3:45 pace so I was safe. The math was going through my head There was nothing more that I wanted then was to stop. Nothing more I wanted to see the finish line. I began to count how many laps this would be on the track. I wasn't talking, I wasn't smiling, I was focused. I told myself do this and u can run whatever at Boston, relax and have a good time. I realized then why I didn't like the marathon- it is hard - the focus it takes- the will to push when u feel like shit cuz if u slow down u could blow all the work u did the first 22 miles. I was never so happy to see mile 25. I knew I could do anything for a mile and I would soon start feeling the finish line adrenaline. I thought of my past 2 marathons, my first which was a pure mess, my second which I did get a BQ of 3:47 - needed 3:50 at the time which I hated and this one which I maybe kind of enjoyed. I saw the finish line and was thrilled to be able to stop running. Thrilled to have a 3:39 which gave me over a 5 minute buffet so I knew I could get in Boston and I got to see Stewart and see how his experience went
He did well and really enjoyed it. Something that made me extremely happy. He was already talking about the next one 😊 and actually training. If my training slacked, his really did. He ran twice in the last month. We spent the day laying in the grass enjoying the beautiful weather and then much eating and drinking followed. A perfect day and weekend.
Wednesday, January 8, 2014
New life hapenings...
Well in case you missed it on Facebook :) - I am engaged!! Yes it seems like quite a surprise to most of you but over here in Leslie land, it was not a surprise. Many of you are saying " Who is this guy?" Well... he has actually been one of my very closest friends for about 4 years now. We have spent a lot of time together being friends, talking to each other through problems, hanging out with the kids, and just having a good time. He was that guy that I could always talk to and feel 100% comfortable. And on a little side note, about 3 years ago - we did date for a very, very brief time and things just did not click. This time after some casual dating and lots of talk of moving slow ( which we obviously we did not heed) - things clicked and things clicked big time! I guess when something is right it is just right! I also know plenty of you think maybe this is all too fast but as an adult, things to me are much different than when I was dating in my younger years. I guess you are just older and smarter. AND I will admit, I am head over heels in love and if you know me that is kind of new and even harder for me to admit but there you have it....
It also brings me to the real reason I blog... training... I have a marathon next week. I originally was training for the black and blue and felt like I was in some of the best race shape I had ever been in and then I went out of town and missed the race. I did not want to leave all this training to naught so I took a couple of weeks off, backed down my training and then begin to train for the Baton Rouge Marathon. I figured if I was going to do a marathon, I may as well try to BQ so BQ bound I will be next weekend. Sometimes I look at my training and think this will be a piece of cake, other times not so much. I have got in a bunch of really good training and some nice long training runs but I have missed quite a few. Last week was my peak week and we all know what I spent doing that week... playing in Colorado. My long run which should have been 22 miles consisted of 6 miles with repeats followed by 5 miles of snow shoeing. I kind of thought at almost 10,000 feet altitude that surely evened out, right??
Well as I like to say the hay is in the barn, nothing I could do right now will make a difference. I had hoped to run 20 this past weekend but it was cold and rainy and I was wimpy. So I did the trail half marathon instead. It was wet and sloppy and I held about an 8:10 pace and felt good and it felt easy. Surely if I can hold that - I can hold an 8:30 pace for 26.2 miles, right? Well, we all know even in the best of circumstance, lots can happen in a marathon. 3 hours plus is a long time and good, bad, and both can occur during that time. I am hoping for all good.
Either way, I would not change a thing. A while ago I decided to not be so obsessive about my training and I have really worked on it. Sure, I did get up one morning at 4:00 to run 20 miles because I knew I was going to be out of town but for the most part, I just do what I can do. As I have often been told " you are not getting paid for this" Even though I have won a couple hundred bucks, a few gift cards, and some sweet bling over the years, I have to remind myself to just do what you can do often.
Next Friday, I am off to Baton Rouge... dreaming of great times with friends and BQ!!
Happy Running......
It also brings me to the real reason I blog... training... I have a marathon next week. I originally was training for the black and blue and felt like I was in some of the best race shape I had ever been in and then I went out of town and missed the race. I did not want to leave all this training to naught so I took a couple of weeks off, backed down my training and then begin to train for the Baton Rouge Marathon. I figured if I was going to do a marathon, I may as well try to BQ so BQ bound I will be next weekend. Sometimes I look at my training and think this will be a piece of cake, other times not so much. I have got in a bunch of really good training and some nice long training runs but I have missed quite a few. Last week was my peak week and we all know what I spent doing that week... playing in Colorado. My long run which should have been 22 miles consisted of 6 miles with repeats followed by 5 miles of snow shoeing. I kind of thought at almost 10,000 feet altitude that surely evened out, right??
Well as I like to say the hay is in the barn, nothing I could do right now will make a difference. I had hoped to run 20 this past weekend but it was cold and rainy and I was wimpy. So I did the trail half marathon instead. It was wet and sloppy and I held about an 8:10 pace and felt good and it felt easy. Surely if I can hold that - I can hold an 8:30 pace for 26.2 miles, right? Well, we all know even in the best of circumstance, lots can happen in a marathon. 3 hours plus is a long time and good, bad, and both can occur during that time. I am hoping for all good.
Either way, I would not change a thing. A while ago I decided to not be so obsessive about my training and I have really worked on it. Sure, I did get up one morning at 4:00 to run 20 miles because I knew I was going to be out of town but for the most part, I just do what I can do. As I have often been told " you are not getting paid for this" Even though I have won a couple hundred bucks, a few gift cards, and some sweet bling over the years, I have to remind myself to just do what you can do often.
Next Friday, I am off to Baton Rouge... dreaming of great times with friends and BQ!!
Happy Running......
Tuesday, December 10, 2013
Random Thoughts....
Life is rolling along fast... I can not believe Christmas is almost here and neither can my tree as it stands in the corner of my living room, not in a stand and undecorated. In fact, I am praying that Magoo and Daisy have not eaten it by the time I get home. I really tried to not do a tree this year but Morgan was not having it. I really have no presents to go under it. As usual, Riley has already bought and used all of her's , Noah wants nothing, and Morgan wants everything but dad keeps buying it and beating me to the punch.. not a bad plan ...
On the training front... it is going well. I am planning on doing the Louisana marathon in hopes of a BQ. I am not even sure if I want to go to Boston but I want the option. Some days I feel like it is in the bag when I can finish a 20 mile run with a 7:40 mile and other days I feel like it is no way it is going to happen. Either way, I have really enjoyed the training and that is all that matters. I loved getting some great runs in with Noah before he moved onto basketball season. I see tri season looming in the future and still unsure if I want to go there. My thoughts are I will start the training and if I love it, Onward I will go. If I don't really like it, I am done. I am through trying to force myself to enjoy something or push myself to do something I don't want.
On the relationship front, things are fantastic. Everyday I am in a little awe that I am where I am and not sure how I got there but I am loving it. It is a great place and one I feel extremely lucky to be in. I have been a little sad by the lack of support from what I thought were friends. Lots of so called friends, I haven't spoken to in months but I guess that speaks volumes right there. I also have a few that just don't seem to offer any type of support in my new life changes which I think is sad because I feel like I am the type of person that would encourage others to do what makes them happy. BUT then I do have those that are sharing in this happiness with me and it is awesome. The good thing about being an adult is you have learned that you do not need approval from anyone else.
On my family front, I love my kids beyond imagine and love this time that I have been able to spend with them stress free. I love that Riley and I have had so many great experiences these past few months as she becomes the wonderful adult that she is
And work is great... insanely busy as always but not sure I would have it any other way.
As 2013 winds down, I am happy and hopeful for a fantastic 2014 and I can already tell you it is going to be full of a few surprises... well at least for you anyway...
On the training front... it is going well. I am planning on doing the Louisana marathon in hopes of a BQ. I am not even sure if I want to go to Boston but I want the option. Some days I feel like it is in the bag when I can finish a 20 mile run with a 7:40 mile and other days I feel like it is no way it is going to happen. Either way, I have really enjoyed the training and that is all that matters. I loved getting some great runs in with Noah before he moved onto basketball season. I see tri season looming in the future and still unsure if I want to go there. My thoughts are I will start the training and if I love it, Onward I will go. If I don't really like it, I am done. I am through trying to force myself to enjoy something or push myself to do something I don't want.
On the relationship front, things are fantastic. Everyday I am in a little awe that I am where I am and not sure how I got there but I am loving it. It is a great place and one I feel extremely lucky to be in. I have been a little sad by the lack of support from what I thought were friends. Lots of so called friends, I haven't spoken to in months but I guess that speaks volumes right there. I also have a few that just don't seem to offer any type of support in my new life changes which I think is sad because I feel like I am the type of person that would encourage others to do what makes them happy. BUT then I do have those that are sharing in this happiness with me and it is awesome. The good thing about being an adult is you have learned that you do not need approval from anyone else.
On my family front, I love my kids beyond imagine and love this time that I have been able to spend with them stress free. I love that Riley and I have had so many great experiences these past few months as she becomes the wonderful adult that she is
And work is great... insanely busy as always but not sure I would have it any other way.
As 2013 winds down, I am happy and hopeful for a fantastic 2014 and I can already tell you it is going to be full of a few surprises... well at least for you anyway...
Tuesday, November 5, 2013
Change....
So, I have a new blog. I know you are riveted but I like to write and share thoughts so I guess it will stick around a little longer.
I have had a lot of changes... Sometimes when you stop and look at your life and things are not working and you are not happy, you need to make a change. Sometimes that change is really hard. Especially when you have a lot of factors to go into it. But, as I always tell my kids "You are responsible for you, you are responsible for your own happiness" It is up to you to look out for yourself and make your life what is it. I often joke and say when I die, I want to make sure that I have squeezed every bit out of this life. It is a philosophy that I really try to follow. I don't want to die thinking IS THAT IT??? and that is how I had been thinking 12 weeks ago. I wasn't happy with my training and many aspects of my life. I love my job even though I work constantly and I love my kids but there were many things leaving me with that empty feeling. So empty that I wasn't even enjoying training or racing.
So... as hard as it was and it was... really really hard. Harder than my divorce, I made some changes and yes Chuk and I broke up. I know many of you are wondering. And with change, you receive some judgement and negative comments and everyone loves to form their opinion. Everyone thinks they know what happened and what should happen and they form their own thoughts and opinions. No one knows but us. I was also very quiet about it because I just didn't feel like I needed to share. Plus it hurt and I didn't want to share. I also didn't care if people were forming opinions. This is not my first time at the rodeo. I was married for 15 years, raised an adult, and raising 2 other kids. I didn't owe anyone an explanation but myself.
So... fast forward 12 weeks and even though I still carry around some stress, guilt, and heartache. The change is good, really really good. I am extremely happy and it is evident in everything I do. Maybe that is why I am running so fast. I am soaking up and enjoying every minute of it because without going into details of my life, I felt like I was due. Long overdue.
So today... you be the change that you seek. Do something exciting, do something that scares you, make sure you can answer is this it???
I have had a lot of changes... Sometimes when you stop and look at your life and things are not working and you are not happy, you need to make a change. Sometimes that change is really hard. Especially when you have a lot of factors to go into it. But, as I always tell my kids "You are responsible for you, you are responsible for your own happiness" It is up to you to look out for yourself and make your life what is it. I often joke and say when I die, I want to make sure that I have squeezed every bit out of this life. It is a philosophy that I really try to follow. I don't want to die thinking IS THAT IT??? and that is how I had been thinking 12 weeks ago. I wasn't happy with my training and many aspects of my life. I love my job even though I work constantly and I love my kids but there were many things leaving me with that empty feeling. So empty that I wasn't even enjoying training or racing.
So... as hard as it was and it was... really really hard. Harder than my divorce, I made some changes and yes Chuk and I broke up. I know many of you are wondering. And with change, you receive some judgement and negative comments and everyone loves to form their opinion. Everyone thinks they know what happened and what should happen and they form their own thoughts and opinions. No one knows but us. I was also very quiet about it because I just didn't feel like I needed to share. Plus it hurt and I didn't want to share. I also didn't care if people were forming opinions. This is not my first time at the rodeo. I was married for 15 years, raised an adult, and raising 2 other kids. I didn't owe anyone an explanation but myself.
So... fast forward 12 weeks and even though I still carry around some stress, guilt, and heartache. The change is good, really really good. I am extremely happy and it is evident in everything I do. Maybe that is why I am running so fast. I am soaking up and enjoying every minute of it because without going into details of my life, I felt like I was due. Long overdue.
So today... you be the change that you seek. Do something exciting, do something that scares you, make sure you can answer is this it???
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