So, I have a new blog. I know you are riveted but I like to write and share thoughts so I guess it will stick around a little longer.
I have had a lot of changes... Sometimes when you stop and look at your life and things are not working and you are not happy, you need to make a change. Sometimes that change is really hard. Especially when you have a lot of factors to go into it. But, as I always tell my kids "You are responsible for you, you are responsible for your own happiness" It is up to you to look out for yourself and make your life what is it. I often joke and say when I die, I want to make sure that I have squeezed every bit out of this life. It is a philosophy that I really try to follow. I don't want to die thinking IS THAT IT??? and that is how I had been thinking 12 weeks ago. I wasn't happy with my training and many aspects of my life. I love my job even though I work constantly and I love my kids but there were many things leaving me with that empty feeling. So empty that I wasn't even enjoying training or racing.
So... as hard as it was and it was... really really hard. Harder than my divorce, I made some changes and yes Chuk and I broke up. I know many of you are wondering. And with change, you receive some judgement and negative comments and everyone loves to form their opinion. Everyone thinks they know what happened and what should happen and they form their own thoughts and opinions. No one knows but us. I was also very quiet about it because I just didn't feel like I needed to share. Plus it hurt and I didn't want to share. I also didn't care if people were forming opinions. This is not my first time at the rodeo. I was married for 15 years, raised an adult, and raising 2 other kids. I didn't owe anyone an explanation but myself.
So... fast forward 12 weeks and even though I still carry around some stress, guilt, and heartache. The change is good, really really good. I am extremely happy and it is evident in everything I do. Maybe that is why I am running so fast. I am soaking up and enjoying every minute of it because without going into details of my life, I felt like I was due. Long overdue.
So today... you be the change that you seek. Do something exciting, do something that scares you, make sure you can answer is this it???
